60 Reasons Why Not to Vote for Newt Gingrich

By Jay Hansen
(Originally published December 19th, 2011)

Okay, it’s been over a month since Newt Gingrich took the lead in the Republican Primary polls, and it’s starting to get on my nerves. I originally set out just to make a humorous piece about certain shocking similarities between Newt and a certain green grinchy creature that tried to steal Christmas, but one thing led to another and this article was born. Sure, I wrote part of it in a past piece, but the list started to grow out of control. I’ve already got 10 Reasons Why Not to Vote for Rick Perry and 5 Reasons Why Not to Vote for James Lankford, so now I give you 60 Reasons Why Not to Vote for Newt Gingrich. Believe me, I know there’s probably even more than this, but I had to stop myself somewhere. Without further adieu, here are 60 Reasons Why Not to Vote for Newt Gingrich.

Newt Gingrich…

  1. Was the first and only Speaker of the House to be reprimanded and disciplined for ethical wrongdoing.
  2. Shut down the federal government in 1995 when he was Speaker of the House because of a personal feud with President Clinton
  3. Committed many acts of adultery while preaching about the sanctity of marriage and family values to others.
  4. Strongly criticized President Bill Clinton for having an extra-marital affair while he was having an extra-marital affair of his own
  5. Claims he was driven to cheat on his wife because of “how passionately [he] felt about this country” and that he had “worked too hard.”
  6. Traded political and financial support to Bob Vander Plaats, head of the large social conservative organization The FAMiLY Leader, for forgiveness of his marital infidelity and political endorsement.
  7. Convinced The FAMiLY Leader to amend their “Marriage Fidelity Pledge” so Gingrich could sign it without encountering conflicts with his marital infidelity.
  8. Condoned hypocrisy by saying “It doesn’t matter what I do. People need to hear what I have to say. There’s no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn’t matter what I live” when his ex-wife asked him how he could give a speech about family values while having an extra marital affair of his own (literally the definition of hypocrisy).
  9. Demonized big government while fighting for more federal subsidies and pork-barrel spending
  10. Demonized the food stamp program, but fought to expand it
  11. Gives “strategic advice” to businesses of the health care industry, as well as Fannie Mac and Freddie Mae in the past, and “builds bridges” between these companies with politicians, speaking with members of Congress on behalf of these companies, but insists he is not a lobbyist and refuses to register as one.
  12. Consulted with Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae for $1.6-$1.8 million in pay, but also said that politicians that consult with Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae should be arrested.
  13. Accuses Obama for being anti-manufacturing, but hires manufacturers from El Salvador to make merchandise for his campaign
  14. Strongly supported a federal mandate to buy health insurance, but flip-flopped in 2010 when President Obama started supporting it.
  15. Supported cap-and-trade, but flip-flopped in 2009 when President Obama started supporting it.
  16. Said there is no advantage to the United States staying in Iraq, but 13 seconds later flip-flops by saying Obama was wrong to leave Iraq.
  17. Flip-flopped countless times on Libya
  18. Believes that the poor are culturally inferior to the rich
  19. Proposed that mothers on welfare should have their children taken away and placed in orphanages.
  20. Believes Obama and the Democrats are as dangerous as Nazi Germany
  21. Blamed the massacre at Columbine, the Virginia Tech shooting, and Susan Smith’s murder of her two sons all on “liberals” and “liberalism.”
  22. Says we should intentionally allow terrorists to attack the United States occasionally to remind us of the danger of not stopping terrorist attacks.
  23. Supports re-instating poll tests for people to register to vote, violating the 1965 Voting Rights Act.
  24. Believes people convicted of drug-related offenses should be executed.
  25. Accused Obama of having a “Kenyan, anti-colonial” worldview, implying that Gingrich does not believe Obama was born in the United States and supports the birther movement, which is laughably illegitimate.
  26. Demonstrated how profoundly at the mercy of the conservative media and Republican establishment he is when he criticized the Paul Ryan plan to eliminate Medicare, earning him massive pressure from them to backpedal and flip-flop on the issue. Immediately he began profusely apologizing.
  27. Has said that any campaign ad against him that directly quotes him is a falsehood (even if the quote is real and in-context).
  28. Believes that “personhood” begins at conception and supports a constitutional amendment stating as much, which would outlaw abortion, the birth control pill, and in vitro fertilization.
  29. Is deeply unlikeable as a candidate and a person, having come in second for the most hated Republican in the country earlier this year.
  30. Wants John Bolton, infamous neo-conservative and fellow FOX News contributor, to be his Secretary of State. Bolton is outspoken in his strong belief that America should go to war with Iran, and in 2006 the Senate refused to appoint him as UN ambassador when Bush nominated him.
  31. Believes child labor laws are “stupid,” and that poor children should have to clean public schools.
  32. Believes tens of thousands of Americans that work as janitors in public schools should be fired to make way for child labor.
  33. Accused Supreme Court Justice Sotomayor of being a “latina woman racist.”
  34. Strongly opposes the judicial branch entirely and wages a political war to weaken if not eliminate its power, saying, and I quote, “There is no Supreme Court in the American constitution,” which is an egregious lie.
  35. Believes the President has the authority to deem any Supreme Court ruling irrelevant and ignore the Supreme Court entirely.
  36. Believes that Congress has the authority to ignore the Supreme Court entirely.
  37. Believes that judges should be punished for rulings the President finds disagreeable by having their court abolished
  38. Threatens to send US Marshalls or Capitol Police to arrest judges he believes to be “activists,” out of step with the country, or that the President otherwise deems unfit.
  39. Believes judges and justices should be called before Congress to justify their rulings.
  40. Believes that the Supreme Court should not hold the power to overrule legislation at all. This, combined with his other beliefs on the courts, seems to indicate he seeks to completely eliminate the courts’ authority altogether.
  41. Believes it was a mistake for the Supreme Court to rule in 1958 that state governments do not hold the right to defy the federal government.
  42. Believes corporations and businesses should determine what their own tax rates should be
  43. Believes corporate tax loopholes should not be closed.
  44. Believes corporations will willingly stop evading taxes if we lower the tax rate even if we don’t close the loopholes
  45. Believes banks and the financial sector should not be regulated whatsoever, and politicians that support financial reform should be imprisoned.
  46. Created and supports a tax plan where millionaires will pay lower rates than middle class families
  47. Created and supports a tax plan where millionaires will receive an average tax cut of more than $600,000 per year
  48. Created and supports a tax plan where the richest 1% would get a bigger tax cut than the bottom 99% combined
  49. Created and supports a tax plan where middle-class families will have to calculate their taxes twice to figure out what they owe, completely defying the conservative taxation ideology of “simple is better.”
  50. Created and supports a tax plan where the tax rate for the richest 0.1% would be cut by more than two-thirds
  51. Created and supports a tax plan where the tax rate paid by the richest 1% would drop to its lowest level in modern history.
  52. Created and supports a tax plan that cuts taxes for millionaires at the cost of more than $360 billion per year.
  53. Created and supports a tax plan where revenue would be at such historic lows that by 2030, America’s publicly held debt is projected to be at 142% of GDP
  54. Created and supports a tax plan with tax cuts for the top 1% that are 5.4 times larger than the Bush Tax cuts, which are already responsible for creating a vast majority of the current deficit, and lead to the loss of over $1 trillion in revenue since implementation in 2001.
  55. Practices questionable financial behavior in his personal life with two credit lines at Tiffany’s for more than $1.5 million combined, further distancing him from the lower and middle classes, all while claiming to live a “frugal” lifestyle.
  56. Used his non-profit charity to funnel money to his and private business and personal profits.
  57. Sells t-shirts, coffee mugs, and other merchandise at campaign rallies to supporters under the impression the proceeds will support the campaign, when in reality they go to Gingrich’s personal profits.
  58. Ran up more than $1 million in debt in his campaign, spending nearly $3 for every $2 his campaign brought in, but he still claims to be “frugal” and fiscally responsible.
  59. Seems unusually detached from his own campaign given that he went on a vacation immediately upon declaring his candidacy and has spent a sizeable portion of his campaign on a book tour.
  60. Infamously corrupt lobbyist Jack Abramoff accused Newt Gingrich of being too corrupt. When Jack-freaking-Abramoff tells you you’re too corrupt, YOU’RE TOO CORRUPT.
  61. And one bonus one for you. It may go without saying, but Gingrich fits into this song just way too well.

All of this… ALL OF THIS… and Newt Gingrich is still leading in the polls to win the Republican Primary. That blows me away. That’s just sad. Think about what that says about Republican voters; they actually believe that Newt Gingrich is the best, most honest portrayal of what they believe and value. Who looks at this guy and thinks “Oh yeah, that’s my man – he’s just what this country needs!” The answer, from what I can tell, is idiots who are brainwashed into thinking Gingrich will fix the government and end corruption (that literally was hard for me to type it’s so mind-bogglingly, obviously wrong) and the super rich who don’t want to see the government fixed because they love how they’ve got the system rigged. Tragically, based on Gingrich’s poll numbers, it would appear that these two groups alone make up a very large portion of the Republican base today.